- What is your name and what does it mean?
My name is Jemma Brown and it means precious gem which is very fitting as I was a long awaited baby! It took my parents 10 years to conceive me hence I’m my parents precious gem.
- Do you think your name suits who you are and/ or what you do?
I think the most truthful answer to this is that it depends what mood I’m in.
- If you were born in biblical times, when names were given as prophesies, what would your name mean?
Something about being stronger than I think or stronger than others perceive. People often make assumptions about me because of my disability, seeing only the things they think I cannot do. There are some things I can’t do but I’m also really good at finding ‘work arounds’ and adapting.
- Which of God’s names or attributes resonate with you the most? (give up to 3)
Elohim is definitely one that resonates with me significantly. It’s the meaning that our God is the ‘true God’ who is all powerful that we can put all our trust and hope in and that that same powerful God created everything in the earth, planets, stars and of course us. Our God is a creative God.
Ironically for someone living with severe visual impairment, another name that resonates with me is El Roi, the God who sees. This is something I hold on to as I have faced so much discrimination and trauma as a direct result of my disabilities. God has seen all the times I have been badly treated and knows every detail of the struggles I have faced – He knows it all. Looking at this one from a different angle God also sees me in my entirety as someone living with multiple severe and enduring mental illnesses (Bipolar, complex PTSD and Borderline Personality disorder). I spend a lot of energy ‘masking’ in an attempt to fit in but I know God has seen all my pain and frustration and knows how much effort recovery has taken. He has seen me at my best and he has also seen me at my most mentally ill yet He never leaves me.
- Is there an experience/s connected with these aspects of who God is to you? If so, please share one if you feel comfortable doing so.
I think that I believe in a God that is all powerful and a God of truth which is really helpful when navigating the storms of life as I know that He is in charge of my life, not me, and He can be trusted. Most of my chronic illnesses are degenerative and will get worse over time, and my remaining vision will eventually go (I say eventually but no one really knows when) and that is a huge burden to carry. As medicine can’t ‘fix’ me, my future health is in God’s hands.
When I am mentally unwell I find it very difficult to talk to others honestly about how I am feeling so often hide it. I take comfort in the fact that the God who sees knows all about my mental health and the ‘thorn in my mind’ (inspired by the book ‘A Thorn in My Mind: Mental Illness, Stigma and the Church’ by Cathy Wield) so I am actually never alone with the darkness as God is always there and sees it all.
- Have the names/ attributes of God that you most relate to, changed due to life circumstances such as illness or disability? How so?
Yes – I think that is actually true for everyone, regardless of health or disability. As we walk through life, different names and attributes seem to have greater significance at various points.
- Are there any of God’s names that confuse you or that you struggle with? Which one/s and why?
I identify a lot with the names of God and it was hard to pick out just a few to talk about so I don’t really struggle with any right now but I think it’s fairly fluid.
- Which parts of God’s character would you like to know better?
All of it! Isn’t that the main part of our walk as Christians to draw close to God and to have a relationship with Him that evolves and deepens over time? I became a Christian roughly 10 years ago and since then, my desire is to know God more. Galatians 2:20 says ‘I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me’.
- Which part of the Trinity do you feel closest with and why do you think that is?
I feel closest to Jesus as He knows all about my suffering, be that physical or psychological pain and trauma. Jesus was also very non-judgmental and went against the grain of the societal norms. Specifically, I’m thinking of when He healed the women with bleeding and made clean the man with leprosy. Both of these miracles were done for people who were cast out by society and considered unclean. Jesus touched them and changed their lives and that was pretty radical! I’m a bit like that. I’m wired to love people and love them deeply, not just my friends and family but the persecuted and cast out. I feel called to show the world a tiny bit of Jesus’ love (in that the love of God is infinite and whatever I do will only be a tiny part of it).
- How do you think that knowing and using God’s names in prayer and conversation might help us?
I think its important because it shows us that our God is HUGE and has so many attributes and looking into them specifically for this interview I thought of more and more ways I could see different attributes or names working together in my life and how actually, they all work together. Our God is awesome, powerful, loving, father, healer, I Am, kind, compassionate, caring, fierce, trustworthy… the anchor in the storm and so much more!
Jemma is a former journalism student who became a Christian at university during one of the darkest points of her life 10 years ago. Since dropping out of university, Jemma has volunteered her time extensively for guide dogs UK helping our with campaigns and media.
Jemma also uses her extensive experience of living with multiple disabilities in a number of advocacy roles including as a guest lecturer to nursing and medical students on topics like spirituality in medicine and PTSD. Jemma is severely visually impaired (blind) and also lives with Ehlers Danlos syndrome and SEMI (bipolar, BPD and CPTSD).
Jemma is a passionate reader of both fiction and non fiction and also loves social media.